Pesky Pals

“Arrgh, please get outta my house!!”, I thought to myself, as I watched a friend of mine sitting in front of my computer, abusing my poor keyboard, sitting in the same leisurely posture as he had been for the past 3 hours.

It all began when this so called “friend” of mine came knocking at my door, asking if he could use my PC to access the internet and collect some information for his Geography assignment. “Ahh, I need to help the poor lad” I thought to myself and kindly let him in. He settled himself on a chair in front of my PC. Something about the way he sat on the chair told me that he didn’t intend to leave anytime soon. I was hoping I was wrong.

But alas, I wasn’t. As he sat there, hammering/assaulting my keyboard, I took a futile glance at the clock which hung on the wall every 5 minutes or so, hoping he would leave. Apparently, collecting information for his assignment wasn’t the only reason for his coming to my house. After his first 30 minutes of using my PC, he asked me if he could play any games. Like I had any other option but to say “yes”. He unleashed himself on my keyboard, hitting it harder than ever before. Everytime he hit one of the keys hard, a single hair fell off my head. Thank god, I’ve a good number of hairs on my head, else I’d be bald by now. Thankfully, after about another three hours of torture for both me and my PC, he got up his arse, and just when I began celebrating, he asked to use the bathroom. After a few minutes, he was back, and resumed from where he’d left at.

At this point, I wanted to kill him, but then, that would land me in jail, so I considered my other options.

–Shoot him in his dick. But no, that would probably kill him.
–Whack him right across his face….. And risk getting his filthy saliva on my fist? Hell no!
–Try to make him understand it was time to leave. But no, some people have such hard heads, if you threw a coconut at them, the coconuts would groan with pain, or maybe even shatter to a million pieces.

That was when a light bulb illuminated above my head. Idea!

I accessed the main electrical switch inside the house, turned it off, and voila! No electricity! I explained to my friend that it was probably a power cut, and he decided I was right. He got his big fat arse out of my house, and I was as happy as ever! I am a genius, even if I have to say so myself.
Nice idea, eh?

It’s true! An idea can change your life!

P.S> A special thanks to:
–My friend, without whom this blog post would be non-existent.
–Idea Cellular, whose slogan I’ve used here.
–Anyone who’s reading this.

And, that’s all folks!

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